Looks Like Fall. Feels Like Summer.

This Northern California weather sure has been difficult to keep up with. The crisp chill of the morning quickly melts as the rising sun takes its place on the throne for the majority of the day. As we slowly peel off the layers of clothing and adjust to the elements, the leaves on the trees begin to shed as well. Vibrant colors fill the branches as they adjust to the change in temperature as well. As I look around me it sure looks like Fall, but it feels like Summer. Well, it feels more like a Southern California Summer...but still!

I wanted to tuck my shorts and tank tops away for the cool seasons by now, yet they are still necessary at times as this weather figures out what it wants to do. Maybe the reason it is driving me crazy is because I too know how it feels to be stuck in transition longer than anticipated.

You might be there with me, or perhaps you have been at some point. You feel the winds of change coming, yet the change itself seems to be taking its sweet time. I have fought these seasons so often throughout my life. Resisting with every fiber of my being because the "in between" somehow feels less than significant. Desiring to feel like I have arrived. That extent of longing is exhausting. Marked by discontentment that breeds bitterness with ease.

When did I buy into the lie that what I am doing and who I am now is somehow a midway point? Sure, there should be goals we strive for to keep us going and dreams that we pursue. But I am tired of staking my significance on whether or not I have hit those marks. There will always be to-do list items unchecked and aspirations unreached...that's part of living! Maybe life is always one constant transition on this side of Eternity. How do we embrace the beauty in that truth? How do we celebrate the now and the not yet simultaneously? How do we strive for more while holding a sense of gratitude for all we have now?

If you are reading this looking for answers to those questions, well, I don't have them. I just want to embrace the reality that I can only be in the now. Of course, I can look ahead and learn from the past, and I have every intention to continue to do so. What I am tired of doing, though, is letting life pass me by because I am waiting for things to feel more certain. That day may never come here on this ever-changing Earth. And you know what, that just might be wonderful news! I may never reach the expectations of others or myself. I may never move into "the next phase" of my life. I may not have it all figured out. That doesn't mean I stop trying...it just means I don't have to be defined by all of that. Instead, I get to embrace each moment I have now -- enjoying the cool breeze of what is to come and basking in the warmth of the not yet.

Things are not always as they appear. There is so much more going on beyond the surface. I'm starting to learn that God does some of His best work beyond where we have the ability to see it. That is when we have to press in a little closer, trust a little deeper, and surrender a little more. When you see hopeless or stuck, He may be preparing you for something beyond what you are capable to bear on your own. When you see accomplishment, He may see just the beginning. I am not going to pretend to know exactly what you are going through or what God is doing in your story. What I have been learning though is that His character is constant...even when circumstances change at the blink of an eye! Even when what we see and what we feel do not align, He is up to something significant. That's just who He is! So let yourself find rest in the rhythms and unknown of this life. Embrace this moment now so you don't miss all God wants to teach you in the meantime.